I had intended to do a post today with a picture of Colin’s newly painted room (stay tuned…it’s coming!), but decided instead to share a bit of my heart.
As I’ve mentioned before , I’m no stranger to grief. The older I get, the reality is, many people whom I’ve loved deeply now reside in Heaven. I grew up in such a happy home with such a secure childhood. Losing people who were part of that “secure” world later in life was a difficult thing. I really don’t enjoy tears much. For me, grief and mourning has brought an abundance of those. I’ve often been slightly ashamed of that…
Right now a dear friend of mine is going through a difficult time. She is spending time with her gravely ill mother, and these days are excruciatingly hard. She has graciously included me as a part of a group of her friends that she sends regular prayer requests to. Her notes are straight from the heart.
Even though I’ve been through similar situations, I feel very inadequate in the “What should I say?” area. I don’t feel my words are “wise” enough and I never want the person going through suffering to feel as if my words are flippant. The last thing I want to do is cause them more hurt and pain.
I was pondering all these thoughts as I made a big pot of minestrone soup yesterday. I decided to also put some ingredients in the bread machine. Ahhh…fresh bread and soup. That’s one of my favorite smells in the house.
The soup was simmering away and I had moved on to the bread machine. All along the way I was thinking of my friend…and her mom…and her dad… My heart was so sad. And I knew I wanted to write her a note to let her know I was praying for her. But again, I had that whole “inadequate words” thing goin’ on in my head.
I was pondering what she had last written. One sentence came to mind. “I just miss my mom.” And that did me in. I miss my mom, too. I, oh, so identify with that. (Although my mom is still living, she has advanced dementia.) And the next thing I knew, I was standing at my kitchen counter sobbing my eyes out.
When I finally got ahold of myself, I glanced down and realized I had absolutely no idea what ingredients I had put in the bread machine! (But, contrary to the title, there were no tears in it. That would just be gross!) Then I got silly… I hadn’t even been following the right recipe! Instead of regular bread, I had made the “rapid bake” variety…
I managed to throw something that seemed to make sense into the machine and went upstairs to type my friend a note.
I did. But in the course of that activity, I had the privilege of reading a note another friend of hers had written. It said this: