It’s OK. You can Sit Down Now…
I’ve had strange health issues since I was a scrawny 6th Grader. All the bizarre puzzle pieces finally came together about 4 years ago when I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I must say, it was a relief to finally hear that diagnosis rather than the “you’re dying” one that I had convinced myself it was going to be…
Those first few months post diagnosis were pretty rough. I tried to wade through a plethora of information and advice regarding a condition I knew nothing about ~ while in a mind-numbing state of physical pain and drug- induced fog . Thankfully, over time, I’ve learned more about it, myself, and how to live quite comfortably and mostly-pain free with it (without much medication – hallelujah!). I’m beyond grateful.
I’ve recently begun to consider it a gift…
Yep. Straight from Heaven above…
You see, this “camp director’s wife” role is a hard one for me. I so want to be perfect in it. I don’t want to let anyone down. I want to mentor and love and shine Jesus’ light to others. I put expectations on myself that I’m convinced others expect of me, too… And, of course, I also would love to “fix” every problem that is ever brought to me!! Isn’t that what I’m supposed to do?? (tee hee)
I think it might be, perhaps, some of the same feelings a Pastor’s wife must go through…
But, this health condition has freed me from so much guilt that I was placing on myself in this role.
Because, through it, God makes it very clear to me when it’s OK to sit down.
This week has been one of those weeks.
While the camp has been buzzing with a full family camp, my husband has graciously dealt with the many “Where’s your wife?” questions.
I’m no longer embarrassed to admit that I just can’t do it all.
In fact, in times like this when my spine feels as if it’s been replaced by a lit stick of dynamite, my head floats with random tingling sensations, and my muscles feel like a bowl-full of jelly, I know it’s wise to stay away from big, noisy crowds…
And snuggle in to my polyester quilt on the couch.
And you know what? It’s ok…
It’s actually been a wonderful week. In between naps and reading books, I’ve enjoyed the beautiful blue sky and sunshine, picked pansies, and had delightful conversations and ginger ale breaks with friends on the deck.
I’m working hard at the “relaxing to feel better soon” thing, cause in a few short days…
I’m heading off to Montana to see my family!!!
So, if you notice things are a little quiet here, you’ll know where I am. I do plan on taking my camera this time, so maybe I’ll check in with you from time to time…
Otherwise, I’ll give you the highlights when I get back.
Blessings to you today…
and, it’s o.k. Don’t feel guilty if you need to sit down for a while, too!
Rita, I had just been over at your blog ‘cos I wanted to look at your etsy store again {I’m smitten with the bluebird!} and I was thinking I hadn’t “seen” you around and there you popped up on fb!! So glad you are taking the rest you need, I hope you have a wonderful and refreshing visit with your family:-)
Blessings,
Tracey
Amen to that story, I too see my fibromyalgia as a gift! Anytime I start questioning why I can’t do everything I want to do God shows me how to do things He wants me to. I will readily admit I haven’t been blessed with as much pain free time or energy as I’d like it is has been steady but slowly getting better (if that’s the right way to say it) I think I am a blessing to others by showing how to sit and enjoy life slower! Keep on blessing people you meet! I will pray for little pain a clear head and good energy…or at least a sense to know when to rest while visiting your family.
Good for you, Rita. I had noticed you hadn`t been around this week, and I had wondered if you were just having a rest-week. I`m glad you are. Thanks for encouraging us all to take the time we need to feel better. 🙂 I know there`s a few councilors around here who could use that advice… haha… have fun in Montana!
So glad you are able to take a rest! My dad has the same disease, as do some of my friends at church. Being real about what we can do and can’t do is a step in the right direction.
Rita Joy,
Thank you so much for this post! I have had Fibromyalgia for many years, and it has been a blessing in many ways. It’s not always fun, some days just stink, but I like you have had to decide what I can and cannot (or don’t want) to do with my time and energy. You are awesome, and I really appreciate your writing.
Hugs, Tanya 🙂
Be encouragged. My husband and I both have fibromyalgia. I have had it for years and it expresses much as you have described. My husbands expresses in debilitating fatigue and he is now disabled by the worlds standards. God has used him in a mighty way for His kingdom since he started being sick and unable to work a full time job. Our ways are definitely not the ways of the world. Rest in Him and you will be a blessing to all around you as you deal with your limitations with grace from above.